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There’s Past, Present, & Future in Planting a Garden with Children

Updated:   |  By Danielle  |  

While I hope you enjoy reading my posts, kindly be advised that the words in this article are not medical advice and I cannot guarantee that they will work for you or your family.  They are my reflections on parenting my four children, based on my own personal background and experiences.  Always reach out to your own health professionals for any questions or concerns.  Please read my full disclosure for more information.  http://mammaprimaverasvillage.com/disclosure/

I never wanted a garden. 

My husband always wanted a garden. 

Moving into our home several years ago, I saw our backyard as a space for entertaining, while my husband saw it as a space to plant tomatoes and basil.  I saw the place our kids could run and explore, while he saw the spot where they could plant a tree.  My ideas were far more leisurely, while his mirrored his grit and dedication to hard work. 

Even as we prepared for the arrival of our first baby and knew we would busy, my husband insisted on having a garden.  He wanted fruits and vegetables that our kids would pluck off and pop in their mouths as they ran around playing and exploring.  Trees planted together that would lay our roots in the home we would raise our family in.

Still, year after year as he planted and cared for our garden, squirrels, rabbits, and even our dog, ate almost everything he grew.  He tried planting marigolds.  And when that didn’t work, he raised the garden.  That only showed us how good of a jumper our dog was.  I still remember the day I first saw our fifty-five pound Labrador retriever jump right up into our garden, her face turned to me, licking her chops while she enjoyed the fruits of our labor.   

My husband still in it to win it, retaliated with a fence.  Our dog responded by removing the fence.  With a lab, when there’s a will for food, there’s a way, especially with our dog Penny.

It was more of a comedy scene than a garden full of produce and I got to the point of focusing on the mere humor of it, chuckling to myself in the kitchen as my husband ran out to get her off of the garden for the hundredth time.  I suppose it was easier for me to laugh, I hadn’t put all of the effort into the garden.  

Still, whilst laughing at the absurdity of it all, I wondered WHY DOES HE BOTHER?

Then 2020 came and my boys planted a garden with their dad.  It gave them something meaningful to do, occupying their time with something positive, a daily activity that took their focus off everything they couldn’t do and put it towards things they could do.  From beginning to end, they selected the seeds and plants they wanted to grow, planted, watered and weeded the beds, and harvested what they had grown for meals and snacks throughout that warm summer. 

My husband working alongside four tiny hands, planted a garden that did not disappoint, one of the few things that wasn’t cancelled that summer. 

We spent that summer mostly in our backyard and everyday they watched their garden grow.  Cooling off from the hot sun in the sprinkler out back only reminded them to offer their crops the same refreshing splash to quench their thirst.  Spotting a ripe cherry tomato as they offered fresh water in a Batman watering can, my kids would pluck off a few, and dash inside to rinse them off, plopping them in their mouths on their way back outside for more.   

By the time August came, much of their garden was growing and somehow the squirrels, rabbits, and our dog managed to leave enough produce for us to share.  Each night before dinner, my kids would run out with a container and search to see if there was anything ready to harvest to complement our meal.  When we had tacos or burgers, they were sure to grab my husband a jalopeño.  And if you haven’t read my blog post about what can happen when we mix up which burger has the jalopeño in it, I encourage you to head over to short stories and read the post entitled, “What A Spicy Burger Taught Me About My Son’s Behavior.”  It’s a good reminder to listen to our kids.  

That summer of 2020 my boys also learned to wear masks for the first time when we asked them to put them on if they wanted to plant a garden with their grandfather.  I remember watching my two year old, eager to be right next to his brother and grandfather, putting on his mask and heading over with his garden tools, listening attentively to my dad explain to them how to grow a garden, offering helpful techniques from his years of farming.  My dads attention on him and his willingness to let him help, gave my son the positive affirmation he needed to put on his mask and be part of the team that planted a garden together on that hot day in June.   

When I was growing up, my dad had always seemed more focused on getting the job done than teaching us.  I suppose that’s how it is for most of us as parents.  With little kids, we are often focused on our to-do list with so many jobs to be done.  However, as I watched my dad with my boys, he stood patiently, instructing them on what to do, teaching them what they needed to know about growing corn in rows and pumpkins and watermelons on mounds.  Unlike parenting, I think that can often be the nature of grand-parenting, offering a slower pace that affords the opportunity to pass along one’s knowledge and teach valuable life lessons along the way.  That summer my boys learned to grow corn, pumpkins, and watermelons for the first time, not from Google, a science show, or even school, but from their grandfather.  

With vegetables that needed watering and tending to, planting that garden with their grandfather also ensured we stopped over more often.  Hopping out of my car, my kids would run over to see what grew and they were not shy in asking for exactly what they wanted to bring home.  Their arms full, they would lug that produce across the yard to our car.  I do suppose the added bonus of bringing some vegetables back from my parents house helped ease some of the frustration when we did arrive home just in time to see our dog snatching another cucumber.  And a year later, my boys went back to the spot of that garden and planted another one together, a few inches taller and many years wiser, they planted and grew their pumpkins all over again.  And as the crisp autumn air came, harvesting those pumpkins in October, ensured the excitement of a garden they grew together lasted through three seasons — harvesting all the way through the fall. 

With my husband’s hard work and dedication, my father’s knowledge of farming, and my children’s desire to work together, there is no doubt my kids will remember these lessons about how to grow their own food far more than anything they could learn about in school.  Years from now, they are going to remember how they did it themselves.  Saving their seeds from dinner to plant and looking out the window to watch the rain watering their garden, illustrates their real world understanding of how plants grow and how food gets to our tables.  These lessons they have learned rich in their families history, present in their minds today, will be carried into their future when my hope is that they will teach their own kids, how they learned to grow not only tomatoes, but also their relationships, their traditions, and their connections to nature and their roots. 

Planting a garden with children offers so many benefits.  Just a few weeks ago I shared an article in a previous post that discussed the many benefits of kids getting outside to play and playing in the dirt, not just on playgrounds that we build for them, but collecting rocks and sticks and interacting with their natural surroundings.  This article also suggests that gardening, in particular, has been associated with an increase in moderate to vigorous activity in children and increases their breadth of knowledge in science.  Children who had increased access to the natural elements in their preschool green space were also less likely to have depressed affect and antisocial behavior.  This paper amplifies why kids really do need to dig in the dirt!

Gardening gives kids the responsibility and opportunity to care for something without much risk.  It’s an opportunity to try some new foods, learn how food is grown, and to gain an appreciation of the work and dedication that goes into it. 

Planting a garden can be a lot of work but it can also start with a few pots, a little planning, and grow into as big or small of a hobby as your family desires.  Ours started as a few pots and has grown to a multigenerational activity that my kids have enjoyed so much that last summer they were part of a garden in our community as well.  They enjoyed flipping over the baseball caps when they forgot containers and filling them up with potatoes they dug in the dirt for — a reward better than a trophy collecting dust.

If you are just getting started or haven’t enjoyed it in the past, here are a few tips from a parent who never enjoyed digging in the dirt as a kid but who has grown to love it with her own.  

  1. Close those books, turn off google, and stop scrolling those blog posts for tips and tricks for gardening.  Seek out a friend or family member who already has had a successful garden and ask them to share their knowledge.  Enlist helpers who already know what they are doing and make it an activity to do together.  It can even be done virtually!
  2. Let the kids choose the bulk of what you are going to plant.  Letting them choose what they want to take care of and eat the final product of, gives them a sense of control and a sense of pride in the garden they are growing.  It’s theirs and they feel they are part of it from the beginning.  
  3. Let them get dirty.  I figure if my kids aren’t getting dirt in their fingernails, they aren’t really getting a chance to be part of it.
  4. Water the garden together but encourage your kids to come up with strategies to remind them when their plants might be thirsty and to check in on them.
  5. Snap photos of their plants as they grow, sending them off to family and friends, and providing opportunities to look back and see how much they have grown over the weeks. 
  6. Set your expectations low, especially if it’s your first year.  We often travel to local farm stands and markets to check out their produce.  If we haven’t gotten something to grow, perhaps, someone else has!  We have found squash in various shapes and sizes, purple peppers, white eggplants, and so much more!  Walking through a farmer’s market with my young children, my kids get to meet many of the people who grow the food they are going to eat and be inspired by them.
  7. And if they don’t like what they did get to grow, keep in mind that it can take kids trying something 10-15 times before they being to accept the new flavor.  At our house, we just keep trying!

Below I included the article I discussed above, an article from PBS about the positive effects of gardening on kids, and tips for backyard safety with kids because not all that grows in the backyard is safe to eat and as you get to gardening, many kids will inevitably want to take their much needed breaks to play and explore.  And they should — safely! :)

I also included a reference to help with increasing variety into your children’s diet regardless of whether your kids are infants or teens.  It has a recipe for a Greek Yogurt Ranch Dip you can prepare together and enjoying with veggies that they learned to grow with you! 

I never wanted a garden.  But thankfully, my husband has always wanted a garden.  And I think we will have a garden every year.  <3

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Mamma Primavera’s Village Mission:

My vision is to create a blog where YOU feel welcome and I discuss parenting in a nonjudgemental, positive framework with an emphasis on the importance of strong relationships on the healthy growth and development of children.

Although I practiced medicine for several years, this site is not medical advice.  This site is not intended to establish a physician-patient relationship, replace the services of a trained physician or health care professional, or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.  All opinions on this blog are solely my own ideas and not necessarily, the views or opinions of my employer.