Scrolling through your social media feed, flipping through catalogs, and opening holiday mail at the end of every year, you have probably seen them — matching family pajamas.
One of the latest fads to hit the holiday season, families outfit themselves in matching jammies, snap a photo, load it onto a holiday card, and then send it off to dozens of family members and friends — my family included. We have done this.
And when I think about it, it does seem a little silly that our holiday greeting to family and friends that year was a photo of us in our pajamas. Perhaps even funnier that we dressed our dog up too but hey, she’s part of the family.
I do wonder though when as a society we went from sending out wallet sized department store photos of kids in formal holiday attire to mass producing holiday cards with pictures of us in our pajamas?! Some of those photos even being shared with the world on social media feeds.
Although, when I think about how many infants and toddlers’ photos I saw over the years with them in tears as they sat in bowties and poofy dresses while strangers tried to get them to smile, putting kids in comfortable pajamas and letting their parents hold them for a comfy photo op seems like the shift from formal to informal was a good move — at least for families with young kids.
However, it can also seem like just another marketing tool — another way for families to go into debt at the holidays. And it’s actually not just a December holiday theme anymore — you can find matching pajamas with bunnies, pumpkins, turkeys, and shamrocks throughout the year on various sites for sale. And don’t forget the pooch — there’s puppy sizes too! You can accessorize with slippers and hats. And before you know it, your shopping bag is bursting and your wallet is no longer.
There are some sites that are affordable and with growing children, you might find pajamas are more cost effective than formal evening wear. They can be worn for more than just one occasion. My kids have worn their holiday pajamas in the middle of the summer on a cool night. Some families give them as gifts or justify them for their holiday photos instead of the more formal attire which when you add the frilly socks, the Mary Janes, the purse and the bow, it might end up being more expensive than those popular holiday themed pajamas.
But do they serve a purpose more than simply attire? The good news as mentioned is that they can be worn over and over and passed down to siblings. Parents in need of updated loungewear, might purchase a set for themselves. And depending on the brand and type, they might also double as long johns. Truth to be told, my family has been known to roll out of bed, add an extra layer, pull on snow pant bibs, a jacket and some accessories, and head out the door for a morning of building snowmen and snow forts — those pajamas serving as another barrier to the cold.
So I think it’s safe to say that practically speaking the matching pajama fad does serve more of a purpose than traditional formal attire at the holidays — providing sleepwear, loungewear, and perhaps even an extra layer of warmth for outdoor play.
But do they serve another purpose? Do those pajamas perhaps, mean just a little bit more? Could this fad serve a more emotional purpose?
If you asked my three year old, he would say yes.
Several years ago when my sister moved in with us and we welcomed our second son, our family purchased a popular brand of matching pajamas. Each year the adults wear the pair from the year prior and we purchase a new pair for my kids as they grow, often borrowing a size from cousins with matching sets who outgrew theirs.
One year when we had several visitors in town staying with us for the holidays, everyone got matching pajamas and on Christmas morning our house was full of the same holiday print walking around eating cinnamon buns and stepping over wrapping paper and bows. It felt warm, cozy, and peaceful.
And last year, as the 2020 holidays loomed before us with a somber sense of uncertainty, I knew we wouldn’t be wearing much formal attire that season. What was the point? We weren’t really going anywhere. So in an effort to dress for the occasion, cozy nights at home, I ordered a few more pairs of matching pajamas hoping our family would feel more connected as we celebrated a quiet holiday season, much different than any we had ever known before.
It wasn’t until almost a year later, that I would find out how much of an impact those pajamas had made on my three year old.
Many nights after they arrived, he would request that all of us wore our matching pajamas. If one of us even had the top or bottom on, he would insist we all needed to retrieve our matching sets and wear them — together. Noticing his desire to have all of us matching, I found a few matching sets when I ordered them summer clothes — it wasn’t just a holiday fad anymore. But I still had no idea how important it was to my son. I suppose at the time, I just thought he liked matching.
Until one night he told me why he enjoyed our matching family pajamas so much, “Mommy, matching makes me feel safe.”
He went on to explain how when he’s scared of the “Big Bad Wolf,” that he’s not as scared on the nights when we all match.
After he went to bed that night, and I dried my tears, I thought about it some more. Those pajamas were more than a fad, they were a symbol of the strength and the unity of our family. They were a simple way to help instill a sense of safety in our home when the world outside seemed so scary.
Over the past year, our family has put those pajamas on to watch movies together, play games, and celebrate holidays — moments throughout the year that were fun and positive, cozy and safe. At the end of the night, adorned in those matching outfits, we would sit in one big chair, reading stories together and singing bedtime songs. Those pajamas took an ordinary night and made it extraordinary.
When I think about it, I actually think I felt safer during those nights too. There was a sense of peace and comfort I felt holding my kids while we snuggled up in those matching garments. Even our family members who lived miles away from us, seemed closer when we FaceTimed them and saw those matching prints in their home.
When I think more about those nights over the past year, I think about the tone in our house those evenings — gentle and quiet. Distractions were kept to a minimum — the focus on our family. Those nights were incredibly special to me, even if I never thought much about them again once those pajamas were folded back into my drawer. But I had no idea, just how special they were to my son — that they provided him with a sense of comfort and safety.
Now, I’ll admit there is one drawback to matching pajamas — and it’s sorting through piles of laundry or dressers to find those matching pairs. However, it’s also become a game for my kids, searching for the tops and bottoms, sorting through piles of clothes to find the missing piece. And those extra minutes before bedtime spent searching — are worth it. A three year old once taught me how pajamas can be a symbol of love, support, and security.
In a world full of so much that can feel unsafe, especially right now, sometimes it is the little things we can do in our homes that can have big returns on helping our kids to feel safe.
The Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia offers a Health Tip of the Week on their website. An article posted in that series on April 7th, 2020 entitled, “How to Make Your Family Feel Safe in Times of Crisis,” discusses how to help families feel secure during tough times. One of their solutions was to create “healthy escapes” that distracts your family from the stress around you and focuses on your connections together.
Those matching pajamas are our healthy escape — allowing us to foster stronger connections with one another as we put them on and engage in quiet evenings together.
Those matching pajamas provide a sense of safety to all of us and they are a fad in our home that is here to stay.
And there is nothing more that I want to be in style than a fashion trend that when fostered in a loving and positive environment, has the ability to fill a child with a sense of peace, comfort, and safety.
To read more about the blog post referenced above from please visit: https://www.chop.edu/news/health-tip/how-make-your-family-feel-safe-times-crisis.
While I hope you enjoy reading my posts, kindly be advised that the words in this article are not medical advice and I cannot guarantee that they will work for you or your family. They are my reflections on parenting my three boys, based on my own personal background and experiences. Always reach out to your own health professionals for any questions or concerns. Please read my full disclosure at the bottom of this site for more information. Very sincerely, Mamma P.
